The Doddcast: Canberra Report 5th July

Election speculation. Election speculation. Election speculation.

How can Sepp Blatter go on?

Will Howard hang on when there seems no hope of winning, especially when the people voting for him don’t want him?

Can Kristina Keneally really get elected just cos she’s hot?

Right now the media in Canberra is focused on one thing: the timing of the election.

But despite all the speculation, finding the answer seems obvious – ask an Octopus.

Yeah that’s right, Octopi may well be the new way in research, given that Paul, the genius psychic Octopus in Germany, is a tipping freak having nailed five out of five German games in the World Cup.

This hot tipping streak could be useful in Canberra this week as freezing cold temps and uncertainty about an election debate pervade the landscape.

The mining tax now buried off the front pages, the Government has to work out what to do with the ad spots it can’t cancel.

Having declared that she has ‘anxiety’ about boat people, expect Gillard to throw the issue of asylum seekers overboard this week in preparation for an August election. Thursday marks the end of the three month period in which Sri Lankan and Afghanistan asylum seekers were refused acknowledgement so expect something before then.

Just a thought: Perhaps we’d be more welcoming if people trying to come ashore claimed to be attempting to circumnavigate the globe, rather than simply seeking asylum.

Funnily enough, Gillard came in a boat – as did many of our forebears – and therefore we may want to think about some of the ‘anxieties’ we’ve caused those before us – given that it is NAIDOC week.

And speaking of undue levels of anxiety, Australian of the Year Patrick McGorry is in the Press Club on Wednesday. So much anxiety. Whatever happened to our relaxed and comfortable country?

Tony Burke, George Brandis, the Crabb, and Graham Morris are on QANDA tonight, with former Democrat’s leader and Gareth Evan’s confidant Cheryl Kernot – who will no doubt remind you that if you get in trouble, change sides.

If you want answers, ask the right questions. If you want the right answers – ask an Octopus.

Paul, the psychic German Octopus