There are some silly buggers going on in Canberra this week.

Firstly, there’s the NBN. With the Bill for the structural separation of Telstra hitting the Senate this week, the government is playing silly buggers on who’ll they’ll let get a briefing on the business case.

The government demanded Greens Senator Scott Ludlam and other interested parties provide signature on a confidentiality agreement that would have prevented him discussing its content of the business plan for seven years.

Then they reduced it to four years. Then a couple of years. And then, two weeks.

Good way to maintain credibility.

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The big news out of Canberra this week, as the Parliament sits back down, is that there is going to be a great debate on the war in Afghanistan.

After dissing foreign affairs as something Kevvie07 did to stay out of Canberra, now we’re getting in Paul McDermott and Andrew Denton as a part of the “great debate” of the new paradigm.

Who will be affirmative and who on the negative? Who knows – both the major parties are pretty much the same on this issue.

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There’s nothing like a grand final to make grown men cry and grown women dance on the ceiling.

The AFL definitely won the pre-game entertainment versus the League, and while it will be a tough year ahead for all those who aren’t a little a little pie-curious.

Now they’re over, and people can sober, time to settle in for the long stupor of summer with the cricket.

If only politics captured the nation’s attention in the same way.

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Canberra Report: Monday July 26
27 days, 14 and a half hours… but who’s counting?
This week we’ll continue the water torture election, leaders will fly around the country, announcing announceables and kissing children for photo ops limping toward Aug 21.
Dripping into Brisbane this week the Opposition’s campaign heads north, while Gillard’s will head to Launceston as they criss-cross the country.

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Election speculation. Election speculation. Election speculation.

How can Sepp Blatter go on?

Will Howard hang on when there seems no hope of winning, especially when the people voting for him don’t want him?

Can Kristina Keneally really get elected just cos she’s hot?

Right now the media in Canberra is focused on one thing: the timing of the election.

But despite all the speculation, finding the answer seems obvious – ask an Octopus.

Yeah that’s right, Octopi may well be the new way in research, given that Paul, the genius psychic Octopus in Germany, is a tipping freak having nailed five out of five German games in the World Cup.

This hot tipping streak could be useful in Canberra this week as freezing cold temps and uncertainty about an election debate pervade the landscape.

The mining tax now buried off the front pages, the Government has to work out what to do with the ad spots it can’t cancel.

Having declared that she has ‘anxiety’ about boat people, expect Gillard to throw the issue of asylum seekers overboard this week in preparation for an August election. Thursday marks the end of the three month period in which Sri Lankan and Afghanistan asylum seekers were refused acknowledgement so expect something before then.

Just a thought: Perhaps we’d be more welcoming if people trying to come ashore claimed to be attempting to circumnavigate the globe, rather than simply seeking asylum.

Funnily enough, Gillard came in a boat – as did many of our forebears – and therefore we may want to think about some of the ‘anxieties’ we’ve caused those before us – given that it is NAIDOC week.

And speaking of undue levels of anxiety, Australian of the Year Patrick McGorry is in the Press Club on Wednesday. So much anxiety. Whatever happened to our relaxed and comfortable country?

Tony Burke, George Brandis, the Crabb, and Graham Morris are on QANDA tonight, with former Democrat’s leader and Gareth Evan’s confidant Cheryl Kernot – who will no doubt remind you that if you get in trouble, change sides.

If you want answers, ask the right questions. If you want the right answers – ask an Octopus.

Paul, the psychic German Octopus

“He must be sacked”.

“We must send a group of former factions to see him and tell him that if he doesn’t change the game plan – then he has to go.”

“This team is meant to embody the spirit of our nation and the performance we’ve put in is not only unpopular but it’s a disgrace to our whole nation,” he said.

“You can’t blame the players, they didn’t have a plan that they believed in or even understood what it was.

“PM doesn’t understand us, he doesn’t understand our fighting spirit. Read more »